Global terror levels

Tell us your jokes but keep it clean and decent or it will be removed

Moderator: Moderators

User avatar
DEEP DIVER
Forum User
Posts: 1874
Joined: Sun Jan 30, 2011 11:46 pm
Country of Residence: ENGLAND
Location: Felixstowe

Global terror levels

Postby DEEP DIVER » Fri Nov 08, 2019 11:54 am

As many are aware, the French government recently announced a raise in its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide". The normal level is "General Arrogance", and the only two higher levels in France are "Surrender" and "Collaborate". The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralysing the country's military capability.

It's not only the French who are on a heightened level of alert: Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout loudly and excitedly" to "Elaborate military posturing". Two more levels remain, "Ineffective combat operations" and "Change sides".

The Germans also increased their alert state from "Disdain" to "Dress in uniform and sing marching songs". They have two higher levels: "Invade a neighbour" and "Lose".

Seeing this reaction in continental Europe the Americans have gone from "Isolationism" to "Find another oil-rich nation for regime change". Their remaining higher alert states are "Attack random countries (ideally those without any credible military)" and "Beg the British for help".

The British are also feeling the pinch in relation to recent bombings and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved". Soon though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross". Londoners have not been "A Bit Cross" since the Blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "Bloody Nuisance". The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the Great Fire of 1666
I tried to be normal once, worst two minutes of my life.
Blue belt in Serious tea drinking.

Barry the old goat!!!!
1985 R80ST being rebuilt #-o
1985 R80RT Touring dream :smile:
2 Harley sportsters being rebuilt #-o
And a VW trike so I don't fall off :shock:

Return to “Jokers Corner”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest