Beware of Suicidal Flying Wildlife

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Jon S
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Beware of Suicidal Flying Wildlife

Postby Jon S » Mon Jun 04, 2018 8:05 pm

Yesterday dawned bright and clear up here in wilds of West Cumbria. So off for a jolly bimble around Lakeland before the tourists wake up, :grin: or so I thought.
20 something miles in to the trip just beside Bassenthwaite Lake was a flock of swallows doing what they do best, swooping around the grass verges looking for a tasty snack of flying bugs etc.
A couple of hundred yards ahead of me was another biker tooling along at or about 60 ish, just like me. Then all of a sudden he starts to wobble and pulls up sharpish, pull up beside him and saw a right old mess on the front of his lid just above the visor, blood, feather, bits bird, :pukeright:
We slowly plod along for another 100 yards or so to a near by layby.
Both of us dismounted, him a bit wobbly on his pins, he took his lid off, his face turned a manky shade of grey and down he went, spark out.
First aid training kicked in, casualty in recover position, breathing ok, pulse ok, not going to croak immediately but a 999 call was made by a car driver who pulled up to help.
A closer look at his splattered helmet revealed a nasty crack in the visor but, the forehead bit of his lid was totally smashed.
The ambo's turn up after about 10 mins, the plods another 5 mins or so later, not bad for a Sunday morning.
By this time he's awake and barfing for England. The ambos pick him up and pack him off to A&E. Left the plods sorting out bike recovery etc and took off to follow the meat wagon to A&E.
Lucky for him nothing more serious than a nasty concussion and emergency underwear transplant.
Got a call from him and the plods to say ta for the help, nice.
So fellow bikers when enjoying the highways and byways this summer, BEWARE OF SUICIDAL FLYING WILD LIFE

JonS
"Never push a full commode" :grin:

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CaptAirhead
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Re: Beware of Suicidal Flying Wildlife

Postby CaptAirhead » Tue Jun 05, 2018 10:15 am

Glad he recovered OK. I got hit square on in the face by a starling when I was driving a Saracen in Germany in the 1960's. Even at top speed of 35mph it was not a pleasant experience. Pheasants are the main hazard up this way. I've taken a few out in the car but luckily managed to avoid them on the bike so far. Beware.. they are out to get us!
Ian.
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DEEP DIVER
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Re: Beware of Suicidal Flying Wildlife

Postby DEEP DIVER » Tue Jun 05, 2018 1:36 pm

I once got a sparrow in the eye while wearing a open face helmet years ago. Had a nice shiner for a week or two.
I tried to be normal once, worst two minutes of my life.
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Rob Frankhamr
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Re: Beware of Suicidal Flying Wildlife

Postby Rob Frankhamr » Tue Jun 05, 2018 7:37 pm

Glad he recovered OK. I got hit square on in the face by a starling when I was driving a Saracen in Germany in the 1960's. Even at top speed of 35mph it was not a pleasant experience. Pheasants are the main hazard up this way. I've taken a few out in the car but luckily managed to avoid them on the bike so far. Beware.. they are out to get us!
Ian.
I agree that pheasants are possibly the stupidest creatures ever invented but you're lucky over there in Dundee if that's all you have to worry about. Over West in the Grampians the worst danger is deer. Now I know what you're going to say... this post is about 'flying' wildlife... but when a twelve point stag clears a six foot fence and lands on the road in front of you, believe me it's flying!

And don't talk to me about sheep!!!!

Rob
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Richard(Sande)Sanders
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Re: Beware of Suicidal Flying Wildlife

Postby Richard(Sande)Sanders » Tue Jun 05, 2018 8:08 pm

Glad he recovered OK. I got hit square on in the face by a starling when I was driving a Saracen in Germany in the 1960's. Even at top speed of 35mph it was not a pleasant experience. Pheasants are the main hazard up this way. I've taken a few out in the car but luckily managed to avoid them on the bike so far. Beware.. they are out to get us!
Ian.
I agree that pheasants are possibly the stupidest creatures ever invented but you're lucky over there in Dundee if that's all you have to worry about. Over West in the Grampians the worst danger is deer. Now I know what you're going to say... this post is about 'flying' wildlife... but when a twelve point stag clears a six foot fence and lands on the road in front of you, believe me it's flying!

And don't talk to me about sheep!!!!

Rob
If those deer are anything like the stag I saw near Glenshee, they aren't deer the're antelope. It made our deer on the
south coast of England look like oversized rabbits.

Jockboxer
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Re: Beware of Suicidal Flying Wildlife

Postby Jockboxer » Tue Jun 05, 2018 9:18 pm

Hit a stork on an autobahn near Bremen a few years ago. Not a lot of fun. :-({|= I didn't enjoy the experience much either.

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Rob Frankhamr
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Re: Beware of Suicidal Flying Wildlife

Postby Rob Frankhamr » Wed Jun 06, 2018 12:07 am


If those deer are anything like the stag I saw near Glenshee, they aren't deer the're antelope. It made our deer on the
south coast of England look like oversized rabbits.
And now for another bit of useless information...

Red Deer are the second largest wild mammals (by mass) in the UK... after Homo (so called) Sapiens. But that's only because so many humans are morbidly obese...

Rob
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CharlieVictor
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Re: Beware of Suicidal Flying Wildlife

Postby CharlieVictor » Wed Jun 06, 2018 1:14 pm

Buddy of mine hit a sparrow a couple years back. The sparrow went right into his helmet and bounced off, down for the count in the middle of the road.
My friend kept going but felt bad and turned around to check on the bird.

Well, the little guy was still in the middle of the tarmac, knocked out. My friend's guilty feeling got the best of him so he took it into his leather jacket and brought the bird to his place.
He used an old birdcage and settled the sparrow in it, still "spark out", hoping the bird would regain consciousness sooner or later.

The next morning the bird finally came back, and upon awakening it was heard yelling...


"shit shit shit, I killed the biker!"
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andys
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Re: Beware of Suicidal Flying Wildlife

Postby andys » Thu Jun 07, 2018 1:57 pm

As though it's not enough to have to contend with idiotic motorists, poor roads and spilled diesel, we have to allow for the wildlife too.
I was once riding along a country road in Kent, no other traffic, straight road with no junctions, just cruising at 60mph.
What could possibly go wrong ?
Well a pheasant jumped out of a hedge and landed in my lap.
They don't look like much when they're just walking around do they,
Well believe me, if you have one in your lap flapping about, they are lethal.
By the time I'd swatted it away in a cloud of feathers, I was on the wrong side of the road.
Luckily nothing was coming the other way.
A friend of mine ran over a badger that just ran out from under a hedge.
He lost control and ended up in a head on with a van coming the other way.
No time to react.
It happened in a slit second.
It put him in hospital for a month.
He said it was like running over a pile of bricks.
Oh yes, and then there's deer.
We have a lot of those around my way.
I once got knocked off by one on a dual carriageway.
I thought I'd been hit by a car, such was the severity of the impact.
Prior to that I'd never really paid much attention to those deer warning signs, but I do now.
I remember relaying this story to a Police officer, who told me of a call he attended, where a cow had fallen off a steep bank and landed on a young woman driving a convertible, killing her instantly.
If you thought too hard about all the dangers, I suppose you'd never go out.

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Old Foxy
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Re: Beware of Suicidal Flying Wildlife

Postby Old Foxy » Thu Jun 07, 2018 10:27 pm

I've had "close encounters of the feathery kind" three times on a bike - all three were pheasants. Latest one was a couple of months ago, whilst pootling along on my Panther at 45 mph through Hampshire's finest country lanes.

Two just grazed the handlebars - like being hit with a sack of potatoes, even just a glancing blow. One scraped the top of my helmet (I just managed to duck (pun intended) and all three birds waddled off, apparently unhurt. Apart from the initial shock, I have been very lucky with no damage to me or the bike. I wonder how a pheasant would fare against my K1600......

I have managed to avoid the deer (so far, touch wood) but I know of a couple of lads who have not been so lucky. Bikes totalled, several weeks in hospital - one is still undergoing restorative surgery on his leg, three years later. I thought that riding in the Australian Outback was risky enough - camels, kangaroos, emus and wombats. However, having done two biggish rides across the Nullarbor Plain and around SA & Victoria, I only saw one goat, a lizard and a snake crossing the road. We never rode at dawn or dusk and certainly not at night, of course. Plenty of dead beasties (Road Train fodder) which need to be avoided, as they are almost as lethal.

I reckon pigeons are the ones to go for, if you have to interact with our avian friends - they seem to disintegrate into feathers only!

I still think other road users (of the human kind) and rubbish road surfaces are a bigger risk, but it does pay to be careful.

Old Foxy

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Lolo
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Re: Beware of Suicidal Flying Wildlife

Postby Lolo » Sat Jun 09, 2018 7:13 pm

Had a few close encounters with pigeons never fun. :sad:

Opened my visor on one occasion and got a massive bumble bee commit suicide on my forehead, felt like a stone but worse was the yellow goo creeping down my face while riding :pukeright: :pukeright:

The weirdest was riding along and seeing my partner roaming all over the road behind me.......Spider had crawled out of his helmet and ran across the inside of his visor [-X :grin: :grin: :grin: :grin:
Living the dream :sunny:


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